My Guiding Principles To Happiness

Life can be tough and it isn’t always smooth sailing, especially when we are faced with life changing circumstances such as health issues, parenting difficulties, career uncertainties or the breakdown of your relationship.

I have learnt that life can serve you lemon’s but ultimately it is the way that we perceive things or what we do with the lemons that can make the difference between finding happiness or not.

I have a few guiding principles to keep myself in a good frame of mind and grounded so that I can always find happiness even in challenging times.  After all, when we are faced with life’s uncertainties, it’s can be easy to lose your path and wonder what the meaning of it all is! These few principles keep me on my steady path.

caralee fontenele

  1. There is a gem in everything, good or bad, you just have to find it.

When bad things happen, we wonder why me, what did I do to deserve this or simply that life isn’t fair. You know what, it is true, sometimes life can be rotten and bad things happen to good people. But there is a gem in everything. It could be that you are a better person because of what you will learn, that you can offer other’s assistance in the future or it could be there will actually be something good come out of the bad circumstances, which has not been revealed yet. When a relationship breaks down for example, maybe the good is, that the love of your life is still a stranger to you and you will meet in the future and have the relationship you always dreamed of.

When good things come along, take advantage of them, enjoy the good times and see if you can recreate more of them in the future. That’s called creating your own luck, you are in charge of your future, so make the most of it.

  1. Rather than thinking you have failed, take the opportunity to revive and strive.

Failures and missteps will happen along the way that is part of life’s journey. It is natural. Many of the world’s most inspirational people have failures, overcoming adversity is what makes them all that much more interesting and inspirational.

When it comes to relationships, as a society we view a relationship breakdown as a failure. Believe me as someone who has gone through divorce twice, both times I felt like a complete, unlovable failure. But the truth is, some things were never going to work out, they were only meant to be for a season or a reason and not forever. This is true for other things in life too when we try something and it doesn’t work out how anticipated.

Instead of dwelling on something ‘failing’ what good can you take from it? What can you learn? What experiences have actually made you the person you are today? How can you improve your life in the future from what you have learned? If you take time to think about it, there are many wonderful things that come out of our so called failures. After something comes to an end, such as a relationship, this is the perfect opportunity to revive your life and strive for even better in the future.

  1. Choose your own path to happiness.

We all have different ideas about what happiness is, which is why we shouldn’t follow the same path as other people. What will make me happy is not what will make you happy. Comparing your life to another person’s life is a false economy. Most often we do not know what is going on behind the scenes of another person’s life, we often only get to see what a person wants us to see. Embrace your own unique gifts, passions, loves and energy to find your path to happiness. In my life whenever I have tried to conform to another person’s idea of happiness, there is no happiness at the end of their rainbow for me. I have learnt the key to happiness for e is to have gratitude for the life that I have today. The more grateful I am for my life and everything in it, or not in it as the case may be, the happier I become.


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I believe at any point in our lives, young or old, big or small, that we can choose to push reset to become the best version of ourselves.

The best is yet to come...


Live life out loud and in the pursuit of all things extraordinary. After all, you only get one life.

Fall in love with becoming the best version of yourself.

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© caralee fontenele 2019